[girly_girl13]

So Bf and I had a good weekend together and were talking about a lot of things. One of the things that came up was whether or not we would have made the same choices regarding careers if we knew now what we knew then. Well one of the things he mentioned was the fact that I don't seem happy. My job is so demanding that I have managed to give up almost all other aspects of my life. I work, come home, sleep and do it again.

So I am going to start taking small steps and see if I can work at rebalancing. My new manager starts tomorrow (yay) so I am hoping that it will help. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

[girly_girl13]

So Bf and I had a good weekend together and were talking about a lot of things. One of the things that came up was whether or not we would have made the same choices regarding careers if we knew now what we knew then. Well one of the things he mentioned was the fact that I don't seem happy. My job is so demanding that I have managed to give up almost all other aspects of my life. I work, come home, sleep and do it again.

So I am going to start taking small steps and see if I can work at rebalancing. My new manager starts tomorrow (yay) so I am hoping that it will help. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

[ldp328]

Good luck!! I hope it gets better. My now husband has been telling me for years I seem stressed by my job and unhappy. I admit, I was much happier when I met him and I was making alot less money, but enjoying life a heck of a lot more. I started volunteering again, working out again, etc. But I realized after 5 years of that, it really is my work. I gave notice a few weeks ago and I am moving on to a job that pays me about 15% less. And I cannot wait! I hope it doesn't take going this route for you - I know I am not pleased about losing income, but I am looking forward to the change and I've found ways to make it work in my budget. Perhaps you can strike that balance and be happy and financially well without making a job change!

[small_change]

Is it possible to delegate some of your tasks? I realize it isn't always possible, but even if you can get a few items off your plate, it might help.

I only work 40 hours a week (plus 15 hours on the bus) and it feels like all I do is work, come home, cook, sleep and do it all over again. So I can only imagine how much worse it is for you!

[ldp328]

Commuting does take up so much time!  I work about 45-50 hours a week (certainly not terrible) but 45 minutes each way on public transit.  I am in school 4 nights a week after work in grad school and in addition to my commute to work, on the days I am in school, it adds on another  hour a day to my commute.  Basically, I am gone from 8am to past 10pm 4 nights a week.  It isn't fun.  But....knowing it is my last semester of 4 long years of school...well it isn't so bad. I have to say when I had a few semesters off here and there, I used to think, wow, I am exhausted.  Somehow for me the busier I am the more I can do, but its because it is more than work.  School is for me.....so I can't imagine working from 8am-10pm 4 days a week.  Hopefully the OP isn't doing days like that all work.  Ugggh I could never!!! 

[happysj56]

Bex, Do you agree with your boyfriend that you are not happy? Or is he not happy because youare not always available to him? I think it is very important to visualize the life you want, and then set goals to get there. For me, where I live is very important. I live where I can walk to work, in a neighborhood I love, in a condo I love. I worked very hard to earn the money for this. I lived in this neighborhood but lived in a tiny condo for a lot of years while I built equity and saved for this. At many points in my career, my job has been the center of my life. I am not married and don't have children, but that was not the life I wanted. I found a lot of pleasure being in the middle of exciting projects. I liked the challenge. I liked the financial rewards. I love what I have achieved. Other people might think I have missed out on things, and I probably did. But everyone does. It is a myth that we can have it all. I like to think that I could have anything I want, but I cannot have everything I want. it is very important to learn delegating skills - that is critical to success and growth. The more of the routine and easy tasks you can offload, the more you are available for the good stuff. I am near the end of my work life, and I am finding other things to fill my life with. But i do not regret the time i spent working. if you are not happy with how much you are working, take control and set boundaries and limits. But if you love what you are doing, do not let others make you feel bad about your choices. There are way worse vices than working too hard.... Best wishes SJ